People Watching

For those that might not know, one of my favourite things is just watching people. Whether it be just observing people as I'm going somewhere, or sitting on a patio and watching the passers-by, people just intrigue me...

Sometimes, if I'm in a snarky mood, I make fun of what people are wearing...or if I'm feeling creative, I try to piece together a story as to why they have the bags they do and where they're going with those items. It's all very peculiar, I know...but it entertains me to no end, and I guess it's the kind of self-contained oddities you might expect from an only child. Or maybe I'm just a sociopath...who knows?

Anyway, over the last couple of weeks I've had the absolute joy of observing two of the most intriguing (at least in my mind) subsets of modern society in their natural habitats. That is, I've recently been to both Starbucks and Wal-Mart.

Now, Starbucks by definition does not imply any particular type of person, but when you stick one in an area like the Kingsway, well....it almost goes without saying that the place will be crawling with pretentious Yuppies in no time. Okay, granted, by the strictest definition, I am a Yuppy (Young Urban Professional), but I feel that I am allowed to disclude myself from this group, as I do not drive a minivan, nor do I have annoying, screaming, bratty children named Paige or Spencer who can't sit fucking still for more than 2.3 seconds.......

{deep breath}

Sorry. Got a little worked up there. I just don't understand how people can't control their children... Yes, it's like dealing with drunken midgets all the time, but Christ! Is an entire minute of silence too much to ask? Sometimes I just want to go over and smack the parents. Hard. If you're not going to have the (proverbial) balls to control your children and instill some respect, why must you take them out in public and inflict them on nice, quiet patrons who just want to read and enjoy their ridiculously over-caffeinated beverage in peace?!?

{deep breath}

Okay. Enough with the Yuppy-spawn... And yes, I'll admit I know that one day I'll be one of them (minus screaming children, of course...they will either behave, or be locked in the basement...I will NOT be a hypocrite!), but I feel I must savour my time before I descend into Yuppihood, as I really think that the Male Yuppy must have had some kind of chemical lobotomy. They tend to have a "Stepford Husband" look about them. Of course, if I lived with their kids, I'd have likely lost the will to live at this point, too....

Moving on!

Again, it's not that Wal-Mart is only frequented by specific demographics, but I think we all know that it's a pretty safe bet you'll run into some pretty serious white trash. Now, I'm not going to assume they live in trailers, as I have yet to spot any trailerparks within Toronto city limits, but let's just say Jeff Foxworthy could make some keen observations about most of them without having to write any new jokes, shall we?

Damnit. I actually forget the snarky jokes I was making to myself in line this afternoon as I watched a family checking out in the next line....something about spandex being a privilege and not a right is coming to mind..........nope lost it...

Oh well.