Not Making Picks, Just Taking Sides
I have come to the conclusion that regardless of the outcome of this Sunday's games, I am cheering for the NFC in the Super Bowl. Let's break it down a little, and you'll see why.
Why not the AFC? That's simple. The two teams are the Colts and the Patriots.
Why not the Colts? I hate Peyton Manning. I have been saying for years (Amr was there when I first coined the phrase) that he looks like a duck while playing football. A couple of seasons ago, we even took to quacking like fools every time he dropped back to pass (we may have been drunk... my memory is a bit cloudy.... which is perhaps more evidence that we were, in fact, drunk). Anyway, he's a born-with-a-silver-football-shaped-spoon-in-his-mouth douchebag. Fuck him.
Why not the Pats? If a Boston-area team wins one more thing in the near future, I might have to boycott one of my favourite writers (Bill Simmons), as he will be come completely and totally unbearable. That and their coach and QB are totally overhyped douchebags in their own right.
In any event, I'm bored with the Colts and Pats anyway. Sportswriters blew their collective nuts when they found out we have another round of Colts-Pats. I yawned.
In the NFC, we have the Bear and the Saints.
Why cheer for the Bears? They have Sexy Rexy, the original Cumslinger who keeps his cock in a garage. In case you haven't been reading here for the last month, I clearly just find this entire thing hilarious. He's just a very up and down QB who has an entirely fictitious persona, mostly from blog-based propaganda... they've only made it this far because of a couple of decent games by him, and a suffocating defence. But either way, I'd love to cheer for him in a Super Bowl.
Now, the Saints are just America's darling right now what with the Katrina bullshit, and that might make some people gag, but they have some of the best offensive players this side of Indianapolis, and they've only been together for a year! I'm positively giddy at what they could do given some time to jell. And if that's not enough, they've got two running backs named Deuce and Bush. That's about as high up the unintentional comedy scale as you can expect from two guys that stand beside each other.
Why not the AFC? That's simple. The two teams are the Colts and the Patriots.
Why not the Colts? I hate Peyton Manning. I have been saying for years (Amr was there when I first coined the phrase) that he looks like a duck while playing football. A couple of seasons ago, we even took to quacking like fools every time he dropped back to pass (we may have been drunk... my memory is a bit cloudy.... which is perhaps more evidence that we were, in fact, drunk). Anyway, he's a born-with-a-silver-football-shaped-spoon-in-his-mouth douchebag. Fuck him.
Why not the Pats? If a Boston-area team wins one more thing in the near future, I might have to boycott one of my favourite writers (Bill Simmons), as he will be come completely and totally unbearable. That and their coach and QB are totally overhyped douchebags in their own right.
In any event, I'm bored with the Colts and Pats anyway. Sportswriters blew their collective nuts when they found out we have another round of Colts-Pats. I yawned.
In the NFC, we have the Bear and the Saints.
Why cheer for the Bears? They have Sexy Rexy, the original Cumslinger who keeps his cock in a garage. In case you haven't been reading here for the last month, I clearly just find this entire thing hilarious. He's just a very up and down QB who has an entirely fictitious persona, mostly from blog-based propaganda... they've only made it this far because of a couple of decent games by him, and a suffocating defence. But either way, I'd love to cheer for him in a Super Bowl.
Now, the Saints are just America's darling right now what with the Katrina bullshit, and that might make some people gag, but they have some of the best offensive players this side of Indianapolis, and they've only been together for a year! I'm positively giddy at what they could do given some time to jell. And if that's not enough, they've got two running backs named Deuce and Bush. That's about as high up the unintentional comedy scale as you can expect from two guys that stand beside each other.
posted by Iain @ 10:15 AM
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